If Microsoft moved

Jane S (jane.s@3do.com)
20 Jan 1997 14:14:05 -0800

Mail*Link( SMTP If Microsoft moved

From: Vogt, Gregg
To: Sweetie Pie; conan; Eric Vogt; Ray V; Ma; Werdna
Cc: Spengler, Timothy
Subject: FW: If Microsoft moved its headquearters (fwd)
Date: Friday, January 17, 1997 2:20PM

>How would things be different if Microsoft moved it's headquarters to
>Georgia or Alabama?
> 1.Their #1 product would be Microsoft Winders
> 2.Instead of an hourglass icon you'd get an empty beer bottle
> 3.Occasionally you'd bring up a window that was covered with a Hefty bag
> 4.Dialog boxes would give you the choice of "Ahh-right" or "Naw"
> 5.Instead of "Ta-Da!", the opening sound would be Dueling Banjos
> 6.The "Recycle Bin" in Winders '95 would be an outhouse
> 7.Whenever you pulled up the Sound Player you'd hear a digitized drunk
> redneck yelling "Freebird!"
> 8.Instead of "Start Me Up", the Winders '95 theme song would be
> Achy-Breaky Heart
> 9.PowerPoint would be named "ParPawnt"
>10.Microsoft's programming tools would be "Vishul Basic" and "Vishul C++"
>11.Winders 95 logo would incorporate Confederate Flag
>12.Microsoft Word would be just that: one word
>14.New Shutdown WAV: "Y'all come back now!"
>15.Instead of VP, Microsoft big shots would be called "Cuz"
>16.Hardware could be repaired using parts from an old Trans Am
>17.Microsoft Office replaced with Micr'sawft Henhouse
>18.Four words: Daisy Dukes Screen Saver
>19.Well, the first thing you know, old Bill's a billionaire
>20.Speadsheet software would include examples to inventory dead cars in
> your front yard
>21.Flight Simulator replaced by Tractor-Pull Simulator
>22.Microsoft CEO: Bubba Gates