[HUMOR] Why Engineers Don't Write Recipe Books

Gordon Garb (ggarb@apple.com)
22 Jan 97 14:00:29 -0800

Why Engineers Don't Write Recipe Books

Chocolate Chip Cookies:


1.) 532.35 cm3 gluten
2.) 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3
3.) 4.9 cm3 refined halite
4.) 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride
5.) 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11
6.) 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11
7.) 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde
8.) Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein
9.) 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao
10.) 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)

To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat
transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two
and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a
radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five,
and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient
eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in
#1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant
agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the reaction to control
temperature rise that may be the result of an exothermic reaction.

Using a screw extrude attached to a #4 nodulizer, place the mixture
piece-meal on a 316SS sheet (300 x 600 mm). Heat in a 460K oven for a
period of time that is in agreement with Frank & Johnston's first order
rate expression (see JACOS, 21, 55), or until golden brown. Once the
reaction is complete, place the sheet on a 25C heat-transfer table,
allowing the product to come to equilibrium.
Courtesy*Integrity*Perseverance*Self Control*Indomitable Spirit

"Remember that the universe, all its horrors notwithstanding, is
strange and marvelous, that love is the law and the drug and the
push and the pull of all we do, that the pursuit of beauty is
useful and hnorable and healing, and that if we choose forgiveness
over vendetta, the clean, difficult solution over the dubious,
easy option, we might yield the wealth of possibilities implicit
in our existence." [Still in search of the author]